Length: Short Story
Word Count: 4,136
Genre: Science Fiction/Futuristic Romance
Available formats: PDF, RTF, Epub, HTML, Mobipocket (.prc)
© Cover Art by Jenny Dixon, May 2011
New Concepts Publishing
Lake Park, GA 31636
This is a work of fiction. All characters, events, and places are of the author's imagination and not to be confused with fact. Any resemblance to living persons or events is merely coincidence.
Maddy stared at the screen of her phone, tapping her fingers thoughtfully. She was playing 'Do I want him back?' 'I don't want him back' in her head, though, and it wasn't just her thoughts that were churning. Her emotions were churning like boiling water, too, making it next to impossible to come to a decision.
How could something that had seemed to have so much potential have turned from gold to shit, she wondered?
Maybe the real question was 'had it ever been anything at all except inside her head?' Had it ever been 'gold' or had that all just been her perspective of their relationship? Had she built something out of nothing at all?
She was afraid the answer to that disturbing question was a resounding 'yes!'
Maybe she should just go down to the company clinic and get a new psyche eval instead of trying to handle the situation without any sort of support at all? At Acme Robotics, Inc. the mental and emotional health and wellbeing of their employees was just as important to the company as their physical health and wellbeing. They made that abundantly clear because not only was the employee clinic fully staffed with the best robotic physicians money could buy, but they actually had extensively trained and experienced human mental health physicians. They were available twenty four seven and any employee could have a break and an appointment to see one at any time. Beyond that, you couldn't pass a bulletin board that wasn't flashing alternating messages to that effect.
How are you today? Have you had your quarterly psyche eval? Do you have emotional problems you can't seem to resolve on your own? Help is only a phone call away! Talk to AR's friendly staff! They're here for you!
Dismissing that, she focused on the screen again, trying to decide whether she should send a message or not. She really needed to decide on that crucial question first. She could compose the message, if she decided to send one, once she'd figured out whether she should send one or not.
Tension knotted in her stomach while her mind struggled with the decision and she finally realized that she absolutely could not make a rational decision. She was too emotional about it to use reason to help her.
And she desperately wanted to send a message that would bring him back, she realized. Whether he cared or not, she cared!
She realized that she'd long since made up her mind to send a message or she wouldn't have been holding her phone and staring at the screen for hours. The true debate in her mind wasn't whether to send him a message or not, but what sort of message could she send that might bring him back to her after the awful fight they'd had?
Sexual. Her belly knotted at the thought, but, deep down, whether she wanted to admit it or not, the only thing she was absolutely certain of-or almost certain of-was that they'd connected sexually. If she had any hold at all on him, it was the sex.
It was worth a try, she decided. What did she really have to lose … except her pride?
That was a sticking point. Her pride had always been her shield against the world. If she set it aside and let him wipe his feet on it, then she wasn't going to have anything at all to protect herself!
But what if she held on to it stubbornly when all she had to do was unbend just a little and she could have what she wanted, a little voice in her head asked? How much comfort was her pride going to be then if she lost the only man she had ever wanted-desperately-as her life partner?
She hesitated, but then another thought occurred to her that clinched the matter. She could set her 'shield' aside and try and then, if he snubbed her, she could recover by telling him he was an asshole and she was just horny.
That much finally settled in her mind, she focused on trying to compose a message and spent another half hour composing and discarding possibilities. Even to her, though, nothing that popped in her mind seemed at all likely to have the effect she wanted.
Just thinking about making up with him in her bed made her hot and horny, though. They might not have connected on any other level, but the man definitely stirred her up!
And inspired her!
Closing her eyes for a few moments, she allowed images to fill her mind of the two of them together and thought about all the things he did that excited her.
Maybe she could just write all that and then decide whether to send it or not?
Should she say she'd dreamed it? Or just that she'd been thinking about it?
The truth was-both. She couldn't lie in her bed without her mind recalling all the many ways they had made love-to her mind-probably fucked to his!-and those images followed her into sleep and became erotic dreams.
What had first turned her on, she wondered, conjuring an image of him?
A resounding everything, her mind shouted as the image solidified in her mind. He was handsome, but she thought it was his smile and the way it lit up his eyes that captivated her. It seemed warm, welcoming, and intimate at the same time, made her feel special and desirable.
His build-just the way he moved was sexy.
She stared at the keys a little longer and began to type.
You were nervous when we first met and a little shy, but so was I and it lessened my own nervousness and shyness, made me feel more comfortable. I think if you hadn't been then it might have unnerved me more. In fact I'm sure that if you'd seemed more confident and aggressive, it would've scared me. Instead, your smile was sweet and friendly and it calmed me and I noticed all the things about you that appealed to me physically and I remembered all the things I'd read in your bio that had convinced me to meet you.
I hadn't meant to have sex with you that first time. I never do that and it honestly hadn't occurred to me that I would want to. In fact, I'd expected just the opposite, that I would NOT want to-maybe ever. I know no one else worries about having sex right away to see if there's a compatibility, but I'd never felt a spark strong enough to pull me in so quickly. And yet, as soon as we came close enough that I should have felt discomfort because we were strangers, I felt drawn instead. The moment you touched me all I felt was a desire to get closer, to feel more, no doubts at all, no warning bells, no uneasiness-just a certainty that it was right and exactly what I wanted.
It wasn't even an intimate touch, that first one, and yet I warmed instantly, became wet with want and the few doubts that remained in my mind fled. I wanted more. I wanted to feel your touch on my bare skin everywhere. I wanted to feel you inside of me and I was suddenly in a rush for it as if I'd known you forever, waited forever to reach this moment of intimacy.
Was it a fluke, I wondered? Was I simply needy and you handy? I didn't think so because I'd never been so needy that it overcame reason or a mild attraction and I certainly had never been horny enough to want to have sex with a man that didn't turn me on at all!
I was disconcerted and embarrassed to discover just how wet you'd made me with only a few caresses and kisses, but I was too excited by then for that discomfort to overshadow my need. I love your dick. I love the way it fits me, the way it feels inside of me. The slide of your flesh along my channel was and is the most wonderful thing I've felt in my life. When I close my eyes at night, I think about the way you feel inside me, think about the way your lips feel on my skin and on my lips and I can almost feel you-almost-just closely enough that I desperately want to feel you and not the phantom I conjure in my mind.
Come to me. Make love to me until I can't catch my breath, can't move, until I'm exhausted-until we both are and then make love to me some more when we catch our breath!
Maddy stopped, frowned at what she'd written and thought it over-hard. Too desperate? Maybe. Moving the cursor, she changed 'make love to me' to 'fuck me'. There! Sex, not love. He was threatened by the idea of commitment but fucking wasn't a commitment.
She read back over what she'd written and more doubts surfaced. All of it said 'I love you', but would he see it that way? Or would it sound like more sex talk?
Maybe she should go back and write something a little more crude? A little more like sex talk and a little less emotional?
No strings, she added. Let's just fuck like rabbits. I'm horny!
More doubts arose, but she closed her eyes, figuratively, and her mind, literally, and hit the send button before she could rethink the matter.
A sense of panic hit her almost the instant she crossed the threshold of no return. She shouldn't have sent that, damn it! For several moments, panic ruled and her mind went into frantic 'chicken squawks' while she tried desperately to think of someway she could undo what she'd just done.
What could she do? Anything? As frantic as she was to think of a solution, she realized fairly quickly that it simply could not be undone.
She glared at her phone as if it was entirely at fault, as if the phone had convinced her to do something really stupid.
Abruptly, she hurled the phone across the room. It didn't help her feelings when it didn't shatter as she'd fully expected it would when it hit the hard wall of her living quarters. What was up with that? Artificial grav was on full, damn it! The fucking thing should have broken into a zillion pieces!
Lurking off of her bunk, she stalked across the room and stopped the phone with her boot, over and over until she'd reduced it to pieces. A cleaning bot shot out of the wall and nearly knocked her down to get to the 'trash' she'd created. She jumped back, stared at the cleaner blankly for several moments and then began pacing her quarters, trying to think how she could recover from the ten minutes of pure insanity!
She examined that idea and wondered if she could carry it off. A very little reflection convinced her that she couldn't.
So what the hell was she going to do if it actually brought him to her quarters?
She wouldn't answer the door!
That wasn't going to help! She would have to see him the next day when her shift started!
"Damn it! What in the hell did you do that for, Maddy!" she demanded angrily.
Her own voice startled her. She closed her eyes and sought calm, forcing herself to breathe slow, deep breaths to compose herself and think.
Pretend she'd sent the message to the wrong number!
That was it!
It was damned shame she'd already reduced her damned phone to rubble and couldn't check the message to see if she'd actually used his name!
She couldn't think!
A plan! She needed a plan! Think, think, think, she told herself.
She couldn't think, damn it! She was still in too much of a panic. After a few moments, though, it occurred to her that she'd done her damndest to seduce him. If he showed up, he was bound to be expecting a bout of wild sex.
Stripping her suit off in abrupt decision, she dashed across her narrow quarters and wedged herself into her tiny particle shower. She really hated the damned thing. She never really felt clean without the soap and water she was used to having back on Earth-which was ridiculous! The particle shower was actually far more effective since water always left bacteria on the skin!
Switching to blower as soon as the lasers had skimmed the outer layers of skin off, she climbed out and used a moist towelette to remove the 'dust' that remained and moisturize her skin.
Get dressed? Or answer the door naked?
Seduction, she reminded herself! At any rate, if they dove right into the sex, she didn't have to talk. She could just let nature carry her through, pretend she was exhausted afterward, and pretend she was asleep. That way, no explanations would be necessary!
The tone at the door of her quarters sounded, sending a fresh wave of panic through her. Her feet rooted to the floor, preventing any reaction to the sudden surge of panic inspired adrenaline that rushed through her, urging her to run, to escape. The moisture that had gathered in her sex at the thought of having her 'ex' in her bunk vanished. Her pussy dried up like a windblown desert.
Her mouth dried, too.
Realizing a sultry look of invitation could be filed under the heading of 'not a chance in hell', she swallowed, beat down the urge to pretend she wasn't 'at home' and approached the door. Her hands were shaking. Her knees were knocking together. She felt faint as she depressed the pad to allow her guest to enter.
The shockwave that rolled over her as the door slid silently into the wall to reveal her visitor was like a physical blow. Expecting her ex, Maddy discovered she simply could not wrap her mind around the fact that the man lounging casually against her door frame was not her ex!
His finely etched lips curled slowly into a smile that made her belly quake. His gaze wandered her length, settled for several moments on her mound and then rose in a leisurely survey to her breasts before he finally met her gaze. "Hi Maddy. Can I come in?"
His voice was deep, resonating with desire. Maddy's skin prickled all over as if he'd actually touched her. She swallowed, or tried. It felt like she had a golf ball stuck in her throat. She blinked a couple of times, trying to engage her brain, but all she managed was to move her mouth like a fish out of water.
His gaze turned speculative for a second and then he stepped forward, settling a hand on her waist. "I think I'm going to take that as a yes," he murmured, gently guiding her backwards as he stepped through the opening and gathered her lightly against his length.
Maddy stared wide eyed at his face-her boss' face-as it zoomed in closer.
She'd never actually seen him-in the flesh-she didn't think. His worker clone often strolled through the corridors of Acme Robotics, encouraging his vast staff to keep their minds on their work, but it was widely held that Simon St. Laurent himself never left his penthouse suite atop the thirty story moon base facility.
Her brain, which had virtually shut down with shock, abruptly kicked into high gear when it filtered through her mind that she could feel warmth radiating from him, could detect the faint scent of his skin, could 'taste' him with every frantic, gasping breath she took. A jolt traveled all the way through her when he moved closer still and she felt the brush of his lips against hers. The moment his mouth settled firmly against her own, it was like an electric current went through her.
Her mind went wild for several moments, questions pinging back and forth as her brain tried to make sense of what was happening, what had happened-why he was there at all! But the brief flurry of activity in her brain came to a screeching halt and switched to basic, primal instinct the moment her mind registered stimulation. 'Good', her brain acknowledged, flooding her entire system with the chemical of pleasure that made every nerve ending begin to tingle and reach out to register sensation.
She was abruptly intoxicated, so drunk and disoriented that she had no clear memory of moving away from the door and to her bunk beyond a sensation of movement until she felt the sensation of falling and found herself beneath him on her bunk. Soft, pliable cushioning beneath her back and the heaviness of his body crushing her into it.
She struggled to get her bearings when he pulled away to remove his tunic, but before her brain could supply any answers to the 'how' or 'what happened' or 'why', he lowered himself against her again and sought her mouth once more. It seemed impossible that she could be any more drunk with pleasure and desire, and yet as soon as she felt his mouth on hers and his taste and scent invaded, a fresh wave of intoxication flooded her.
He explored her throat and her breasts with an impatience that she felt echo within her. She was torn by a desperation for him to continue pulling at her nipples and filling her with excitement and a sudden need to feel his cock filling her. Almost as if he had read her mind or sensed her frantic need, she felt him tugging at the opening of his trousers.
Her heart almost felt as if it leapt into her throat, making it close with a mixture of anticipation and anxiety. She spread her legs anxiously in invitation even before she felt the heated, hard length of his erection, coiling her legs around him and dry humping him to get her message across. His hands shook as he struggled to find her opening, frustrated momentarily by her frantic movements. She grunted when he finally engaged his flesh with hers, her mind going wild with excitement as she felt the size and heaviness of his engorged cock.
In, was all she could think as she heaved against him, trying to engulf him. He released a pent up breath and sucked in another harsh one, holding it as he pressed into her. She groaned when he finally achieved full penetration and she felt him deeply inside of her. Squeezing her eyes tightly, she focused on the feel of his flesh gliding outward again along her channel and then in, a few slow strokes and then he increased his rhythm. She curled her hips, trying to find the angle that would target the one spot she needed him to find. They waltzed. He changed his rhythm and position until she felt a burst of sensation that told her they'd achieved the perfect angle to please her. His next stroke produced more lovely tingles, a building of tension. She held her breath, held her position. The tension increased quickly. She strained, trying to reach the pinnacle, fighting the frustration that threatened when her body hovered at the edge for many long moments and then felt the tremors.
"Oh god! Simon!" she gasped, fearful for several moments that she would miss.
It didn't happen. Encouraged by her command, he pumped harder and faster. The tension inside her reached maximum overload and snapped. Exploding sensation washed through her, forcing her gasps to a keener pitch as her climax carried her into rapture so intense she felt darkness swirl around her mind.
He shook with his own imminent release. "God! I'm about to cum!" he gasped hoarsely and then did, pumping his hot semen inside of her.
She released a long sigh of relief as her climax peaked and then her body slowly drifted back toward normalcy, cooling slowly, her heart rate slowing its frantic pace. He slumped against her finally, growing heavier, but his weight was comforting, sending a different sort of pleasure through her with the reflection that he'd found pleasure in her, as well.
She didn't want to think. She wanted to bask in the reflection of glory she'd just experienced.
But reason reasserted itself. Her mind ceased to function on its primal instincts and the questions that had been held at bay returned.
She felt the tension slowly return to Simon even as her own returned. After a few moments, he eased away from her, studied her face for several moments and then shifted to one side to relieve her of his weight. She kept her eyes firmly closed. She discovered she didn't want to know any of the answers to the questions flitting around her mind.
She was going fake sleep!
Maybe he would leave and she'd never have to know what had brought him to her door?
He released a pent up breath and chuckled wryly. "Don't be pissed, Maddy."
The comment surprised her so much she couldn't maintain her pretense of having fallen asleep. She opened her eyes to look at him.
He grimaced, scrubbed a hand over his face. "Thomas went to the clinic to talk after the fight the two of you had. They decided that it would be best to block any further communications between the two of you."
Maddy blinked at him, felt her jaw sag with surprise.
He shrugged. "He didn't know how to deal with it without causing you distress. It was to protect you, not him." His lips curled with disgust. "He has poor relationship skills and he's emotionally … retarded-hasn't been able to develop healthy emotions or, in fact, much in the way of emotions at all. He's in treatment."
Maddy couldn't think of anything to say, but a wave of nausea washed over her. She licked her dry lips. "Meaning …?"
"Meaning he can't respond. He doesn't feel emotions like he should-and he knows he can't and his reaction is anger and frustration-which isn't good for him either."
Maddy digested that with an effort, struggling with the urge to cry. She hadn't been wrong, after all! He really didn't care anything about her. He couldn't! He just wasn't capable of it!
Simon settled a hand along her cheek, forcing her to look at him. "I'm healthy-physically, mentally, and emotionally."
Maddy stared at him blankly.
"According to the analysis, you and I are a perfect match."
Maddy blinked, struggling to get her brain into gear.
He looked uncomfortable. "Your call came to me."
She gaped at him. "I send the message to the wrong number?" she asked blankly.
He seemed to struggle with his answer for a few moments. "Sort of. It wasn't the number you intended. It was redirected to me."
Maddy frowned. "You fixed it so that any call I tried to make to him would go to you?"
"Not exactly. I just didn't override it when I was notified that the computers had determined that to be the best response."
Maddy felt her face heat. "So … uh … did you mean for this to happen?"
He looked indecisive for a moment. "Are you going to be pissed off if I say I meant for this to happen?" he hedged.
Maddy frowned, trying to decide.
He grinned abruptly. "Because if you are, then the answer is no and if you're glad it happened, then the answer is yes."
Maddy couldn't help but chuckle, despite the rollercoaster ride her emotions had taken. "You aren't sorry?" she asked finally.
His eyes gleamed with a mixture of amusement, triumph, and desire. "I can't say I'm happy mine was the wrong number, but I think the computers were absolutely dead on in their computations." He grimaced. "At least, I think you're perfect for me. I'm not sure you feel the same way."
Maddy thought it over and finally smiled a little shyly. "Let's try that again. I think I need to check the fit … just to be sure, you know?"